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A winter morning in Canada

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous' started by Ken The Kanuck, Feb 2, 2018.

  1. Ken The Kanuck

    Ken The Kanuck Member

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    What a morning……
    8:00
    I made a snowman in the front of my house.
    8:10
    A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn’t make a snow woman.
    8:15
    So, I made a snow woman.
    8:17
    The nanny of the neighbors complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest.
    8:20
    The gay couple living nearby grumbled that it could have been two snowmen instead.
    8:25
    The vegans at No. 12 complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with.
    8:28
    I am being called a racist because the snow couple is white.
    8:31
    The Muslim gent across the road wants the snow woman to wear a headscarf.
    8:40
    Someone calls the cops who show up to see what’s going on.
    8:42 I am told that the broomstick of the snowman needs to be removed because it could be used as a deadly weapon. Things get worse after I mutter : "Yeah, if it's up your a***"
    8:52
    My phone is seized and thoroughly checked while I am being blindfolded and flown to the police station in a helicopter.
    9:00
    I'm on the news as a suspected terrorist bent on stirring up trouble during this difficult weather.
    9:10
    I am asked if I have any accomplices.
    9:29
    A little known jihadist group has claimed it was their plot.
    Moral:When it's this cold in Canada... stay inside.
     
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  2. ULITHI

    ULITHI Ace

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    Thanks Ken, after a long Friday, that made laugh pretty hard.
     
  3. wooley12

    wooley12 Active Member

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    Canadian problem, eh? I'm from New York and have learned 1000 ways to tell some one to STFU............ with a smile.
     
  4. FredCarson

    FredCarson New Member

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    Hahaha! I wasn't expecting that.
     
  5. Otto

    Otto Spambot Nemesis Staff Member WW2|ORG Editor

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    Damned Canadians! Always stirring up controversy. The gender of those snowpersons should never be questioned or addressed! How dare you!

    Thank the creator you have mighty hair boy Justin to make everything better.
     
  6. Slipdigit

    Slipdigit Good Ol' Boy Staff Member WW2|ORG Editor

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    Moral:When it's this cold in Canada... stay inside.

    what qualifies as "cold" in Canerduh?
     
  7. OpanaPointer

    OpanaPointer I Point at Opana Staff Member WW2|ORG Editor

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    *waves from Key West* (Only hand above water.)
     
  8. Otto

    Otto Spambot Nemesis Staff Member WW2|ORG Editor

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    I'm from Texas. What the heck is a snowman?
     
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  9. OpanaPointer

    OpanaPointer I Point at Opana Staff Member WW2|ORG Editor

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    It's made from bricks of cocaine that have been floating in the Rio Grande.
     
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  10. Otto

    Otto Spambot Nemesis Staff Member WW2|ORG Editor

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    That wouldn't be called a snowman, that's a blowman.
     
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  11. Otto

    Otto Spambot Nemesis Staff Member WW2|ORG Editor

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    Snowpeoplekind.
     
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  12. CAC

    CAC Ace of Spades

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    A lot of tourists are surprised that Australia has more snow than most countries (Australia has ALL the different terrains available) - The Australian Alps...
    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
     
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  13. OpanaPointer

    OpanaPointer I Point at Opana Staff Member WW2|ORG Editor

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    Missouri has all four seasons on any given day.
     
  14. CAC

    CAC Ace of Spades

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    Sounds like Melbourne...
    ""Four seasons in one day" was a common Melbourne phrase, 'cause you go from a blazing hot, sunny day to raining and then it'd be hailing that night."

    That's Melbourne for you....weird.
     
  15. Slipdigit

    Slipdigit Good Ol' Boy Staff Member WW2|ORG Editor

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    Y'all have nothing on Alabama, with 4 seasons in a day. We have all 4 in a day, twice.
     
  16. Kai-Petri

    Kai-Petri Kenraali

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    The winter in Lapland

    [​IMG]

    And the ugly side when you go to your car in the morning....

    [​IMG]
     
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  17. CAC

    CAC Ace of Spades

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    That’s Mind boggling!
     

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