A World War Two Joke

Q: What Does "Maginot Line" mean in French?
A: "Speed bump ahead"

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A little boy and his father are listening to the Fuhrer's speech on the radio as Germany declares war on the USA. The boy asks his father where the USA is. The father takes down a globe and runs his hand across the USA, saying "All of this area of North America, son".

The boy looks at the globe and asks "and where is the British Empire?". The father indicates Britain, Canada, South Africa, Australia, New Zealand, and India on the globe.

"I see", said the boy. "And where is Russia?" The father showed him the sprawling mass of the USSR on the globe. The boy's eyebrows furrowed with concentration.

"And where is Germany?", he asks. His father points at the area of central Europe where the Reich is located. The boy looks very concerned and says "Dad, has Hitler seen this?"

 

Sorry, I don't get it. Please explain.

 

KM,

I do find it as amusing as the famous " Heil Shicklebgruber!"

 

Another one being in line:

A man goes through the streets, shouting: "Me comes first, then comes Hitler!" Of course, he is arrested.

The Gestapo officer harshly asks: "Your name?"

The man replies: "Heil."

 

That was funny KM!

( Anyway, many many of these jokes only work/work better when you consider yourself being in nazi Germany/WW2 period country really because they are jokes told by the people at the time. )

 

This one works today:

http://www.ww2forums.com/cgi-bin/ubbcgi/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic;f=33;t=000206;p=5

the one posted 28 October, 2003 04:14 PM

 

"The Pope! how many divisions has he got?"
- Stalin

"Tell my son Josef that he will meet my divisions in eternity."
- Reply from the Pope when he heard the story years later.

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Not a very funny reply but we now know there was a reply....

 

Allied bombers are dropping hay on Germany

Why is that?

For the asses who still believe in the vengeance weapons.

 

Think you were sitting in Ju 52(?) on the way to Germany in 1944. And this was suddenly the view from the window...Oops!

 

Not wishing to steal your thunder but I'd say you are instead sitting on a Douglas A-20 Boston. Anyway this looks a lot like Sovphotoshop, considering the differences in light orientation on the engine cowling and on the Yak fuselages...

 

wow thats a great photo.

 

As Za said it is also a fake photo. The clouds and planes are going in too many directions.

 

Relax guys! That´s why I put it into the WW2 jokes section....Just let your imagination flow. I just thought it a great pic and just happened to wonder what , say, a German general returning from the front would think in 1944 if he suddenly caught this kind of view from his window...
" Where is the Luftwaffe?? Oh, Hello boys! Going somewhere for a beer or two?"....

 

Any response is better than no response at all...



BTW,



A gold-mining town in Ontario, Canada - named 'Swastika' for good luck in the 1900's

 

haha, that is interesting, and its still called that today?

 

Well, the swastika never had any negative connections until the Adolf came up with it for his Brownshits, besides the town predates that foolery so why change the name?

But it sure is ironic and it got my eyes opened

Enough waffling, we're ruining the thread, on with the jokes!

- Do you know how to make a nazi cross?
- No!
- You stamp on his toes!
(Monty Python)

[ 22. September 2006, 11:29 AM: Message edited by: Za Rodinu ]

 

thats good! lol

 

Propaganda leaflet dropped by RAF Bomber Command over Germany in 1942

 

"Göring has attached an arrow to the row of medals on his tunic. It reads 'continued on the back.'"


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Two men meet. "Nice to see you're free again. How was the concentration camp?"
"Great! Breakfast in bed, a choice of coffee or chocolate, and for lunch we got soup, meat and dessert. And we played games in the afternoon before getting coffee and cakes. Then a little snooze and we watched movies after dinner."
The man was astonished: "That's great! I recently spoke to Meyer, who was also locked up there. He told me a different story."
The other man nods gravely and says: "Yes, well that's why they've picked him up again."

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"My father is in the SA, my oldest brother in SS, my little brother in the HJ (Hitler Youth), my mother is part of the NS women's organisation, and I'm in the BDM (Nazi girls group)."
"Do you ever get to see each other," asks the girl's friend?
"Oh yes, we meet every year at the party rally in Nuremberg!"

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The German army HQ receives news that Mussolini's Italy has joined the war.
"We'll have to put up 10 divisions to counter him!" says one general.
"No, he's on our side," says another.
"Oh, in that case we'll need 20 divisions."

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"What will you do after the war?"
"I'll finally go on a holiday and will take a trip round Greater Germany!"
"And what will you do in the afternoon?"

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Hitler visits a lunatic asylum. The patients give the Hitler salute. As he passes down the line he comes across a man who isn't saluting.
"Why aren't you saluting like the others?" Hitler barks.
"Mein Führer, I'm the nurse," comes the answer. "I'm not crazy!"

http://www.spiegel.de/international/0,1518,434399,00.html